One year ago today I stored all my belongings in my friend Francis’ garage in San Diego and began my journey of working remotely around the world. {Special shout-out to him for being such a gracious friend.}

Seeing all my possessions in once place was humbling. I am proud to not be a hoarder and it’s clear I spend all of my money on food and traveling. {Another special shout-out to my people at Dominos, you know who you are.}

Also, I don’t miss any of those items! Well, maybe my Josh Allen candle.

April, 2022 was a very transitional month for me. I had just gone through a breakup, found out my boss was leaving (essentially putting me in charge of a stressful situation), was dealing with some health stuff, and was moving out of an apartment I had lived in/loved for six years. On top of that, we were all still recovering from the insanity that was the Covid -19 pandemic.

Since that day on April 24, 2022, I’ve traveled and worked remotely in 8 countries, 8 states, and 35 cities; lived in 12 Airbnbs, 15 hotels, and crashed on several friend’s couches; airports became a commonplace; I slowly became a pro at navigating train and metro systems; regretted (almost daily) lugging around my giant suitcase (pack light kids!), and smooched 5 European men.

I am so proud of how much I’ve developed as a person, especially with my confidence of being on my own and traveling internationally solo.

And not only did I succeed at working remotely, I was acknowledged for kicking butt. I think part of that was the fact my excitement/zest for life was at an all time high. I would wake each morning with a smile on my face and elated at what the day could bring. In Europe, I worked EST hours which allowed me to explore until late afternoon. By the time I started my work day, I had already logged 15,000+ steps!

Reflecting on the last year makes me happy. Someday, when I’m an old {still hot} lady, I can’t wait to share my adventures while drinking wine and getting handsy with my accented husband.

Thought I would also include some of the things I’ve learned below. Hopefully this helps encourage anyone reading to also embark on their own adventure/push themselves out of their comfort zone, whatever that may be.

Now… where to next?

Things I’ve learned

As someone who is a “planner,” being spontaneous can be both rewarding and plain fun, you never know where the day will take you. Traveling alone is a mix of empowering, scary and rewarding. Food is just better in Europe. Accents make men about 20-30% more attractive. Having friends who were willing to meet up with me during my journey made it even more magical. And being able to spend time with family on the east coast has been priceless.

Jess’ tips for traveling to Europe/UK alone

1. Take advantage of the freshly squeezed OJ. Everyday if possible. Nectar of the gods in my opinion. 
2. Drink house wine. It’s cheap. And good. 
3. Make friends. Now’s your chance to meet people from all over the world and learn about their culture. 
4. Understand European appliances. For example: don’t use laundry detergent in the dishwasher like I did by accident. Oops. 
5. Europeans don’t like dryers for some reason. Allot time for drying on clothesline. 
6. Wear trendy sneakers, cobblestones don’t like heels and no one wants to see you walking like a dinosaur. Well maybe we do. 
7. The ground floor is not considered the first floor, it is considered 0. You’re welcome. 
8. Be prepared to walk up a lot of stairs. Many places don’t have elevators. 
9. Pack light. A lot of places don’t have elevators and you look like a dumbass with your big bag (I know from experience). 
10. At the train station, be sure to get your ticket time stamped before you board. 
11. Patience is clutch. Sometimes traveling can bring out the worst in people. 
12. Remember, your US plugs don’t work in European outlets. Get an adapter (they’re everywhere at the stores over there). Also I wouldn’t bring your hairdryer and just use the one at the hotel/Airbnb. The wattage doesn’t translate over there. 
13. Take notes—traveling is so eye opening and inspiring. I love writing down things to read, research ideas, stores I like, recipes to try, etc. from each place I visit. 
14. Always look both ways. In some countries you drive on the other side of the road. Or they just don’t have any rules and it’s insanity (like Italy). Or there are bicycles everywhere (like Amsterdam). 
15. Most places are cashless and take credit cards. Use one without a foreign transaction fee and let them know you’re traveling ahead of time so they don’t mark it as fraudulent. Also, no need to bring cash, just use your ATM card over there. 
16. Tipping: no need to leave big tips. They don’t do that in Europe. A few euros will do. 
17. Give yourself extra time—it’ll take longer than you think. And you’re not familiar with how they do things in that country and you’ll hit some snags. 
18. There are rarely mirrors, outlets, and counter space in the bathrooms so a travel mirror is nice to have.
19. Enjoy every minute. Life is short!

For Thanksgiving 2016 I traveled to Tulum, Mexico with my friends Courtney and Emily. 

I was so looking forward to a few days of lounging by the pool, exploring the Mayan ruins, binging on piña coladas, and taking advantage of an all-inclusive resort by EATING ALL THE THINGS.

*I’ll preface this story with the fact I was still in my early 30s and my metabolism was not yet dead.

This was going to be my first experience at an all-inclusive resort and I was literally shaking with excitement.

I’ve always been a fan of buffets–what’s not to love? Anything unlimited brings me absolute joy. Growing up, we celebrated special occasions at Ponderosa and those memories of making multiple trips to the buffet for overcooked mac and cheese will stay with me forever.

And Olive Garden is my happy place–when you’re there, you’re family! I once thought of getting a tattoo of an infinity sign with the words “soup, salad, and breadsticks” next to it (kidding, not kidding).

So the idea of spending four days with the option to eat everything at anytime… I was up for the challenge. Bring it on!

I remember my first plate of food when we got to the resort. I overlooked the fact that the food options were mostly crappy American (authentic Mexican food is insanely good), and went straight for the chicken nuggets. Added some pizza, pasta, and let’s not forget the huevos con weenies AKA hot dog eggs AKA huevos con salchicha. Whoever invented scrambled eggs with boiled hot dogs should be given a hug and a pat on the back. What a perfectly balanced breakfast with a hint of trashy.

My average plate count for each meal was about 3-4. I couldn’t stop eating. There was a fire in me I had never felt before and my desire for those nugs and weenie eggs consumed my thoughts.

Sure the pool and beach were nice, but those nugs were simply beautiful.

One day, we decided to do a day excursion to a water park. This water park was no joke–it was built around a cenote (sinkhole) and had zip lining, a lazy river, snorkeling, and… a buffet.

So in addition to my buffet experience for breakfast, I had a new buffet option for lunch. But don’t fear, they had chicken nuggets and weenie eggs.

After a fun day, we went back to our resort and swung by the dining hall for another snack. I should mention my girlfriends practiced much more self restraint than I did. And on top of the gluttonous journey I was on, I was also binging on piña coladas (not the lightest of beverages to indulge in).

Have I set the scene yet?

Now, the buffet at the resort was not our only dining option. There were other restaurants you could visit–Italian, Asian, etc. The previous night we had fun at one of the restaurants pretending one of us was celebrating a birthday while the waiter blindfolded us, spun us in our chairs and poured tequila down our throats.

We decided to try one of the other restaurants that evening and headed back to our hotel room to clean up after a fun day at the water park.

Courtney and I were both using the mirror in the bathroom to put on makeup when a sudden hot flash consumed my whole body. “Woah!” I said as I gave Courtney a look of extreme panic. “You okay?” she asked. “I… I may need a minute. Mind if I use the bathroom?” I said sheepishly.

Without going into too much detail, I’ll just say that at that moment my digestive system officially surrendered.

I opened the bathroom door and told the girls to go to dinner without me, it was for the best. I also didn’t think I could ingest one more morsel of food.

The girls headed out to dinner and the next few hours were quite torturous. Damn those hot dog eggs and nuggets.

I was lying on the bed, most likely with beads of perspiration on my head, when I heard a knock at the door. With hesitation, I opened the door and a man greeted me and said, “Hola, I am the plumber, the hotel called me to come here and fix your toilet.” To which I replied, “I can assure you the toilet is working perfectly fine.” The man looked at me with a bit of confusion and said, “The guests above reported excessive flushing and we’re here to help fix it.” I laughed, thanked him and told him everything was working fine (the toilet that is and not my internal organs).

As I walked back to the bed, I laughed. Courtney and Emily got me! Clearly this was a prank to make fun of me for succumbing to the buffet devil gods.

About an hour later, Courtney and Emily return and I immediately yell, “You gals got me!” and laughed. They both looked at me with a curious look on their faces and asked what I was talking about. “You had that guy come and pretend the toilet was broken. Excessive flushing. Ha!”

They both started laughing hysterically and said they absolutely did not call anyone. At that moment, my already flushed and sweaty face turned even redder knowing the consequences of my buffet consumption was noticed by others. I felt so embarrassed I wanted to go hide under a rock (definitely not a plate of nugs).

From that moment on, my friends would joke anytime they saw a reference to someone eating a chicken nugget. I will never live down my first all-inclusive experience and the 2016 crash of my digestive system and dignity.

What’s the moral of the story you may ask? Well, I say, go to that buffet, do some damage, but maybe don’t have 6 plates at a time.

This past weekend I was invited to a going away party for a friend deploying to Iraq. I was looking forward to an evening with great friends at one of my favorite restaurants in San Diego.

The evening started off innocently enough; we all mingled and sipped on cocktails. Then it became time to sit down for dinner.

We were all seated at a long family-style dinner table. It was gorgeously set and decorated.

The hosts for the evening stood up to make a speech. They kindly thanked everyone for coming and said some words about the deployment. Then… all of a sudden they called an officiant to the front of the room.

The room grew quiet. What was happening? Are they getting engaged? Is she pregnant? Is this for real?

Suddenly, my friend grabbed something out of a box. It was a long, beautiful veil. As she placed it on her head we all gasped. This was happening! They are getting married in front of us!

Joyous sobs and cries spread throughout the room. Complete shock and joy consumed all of us. Such an amazing moment!

The “going away party” ended up being one of the top ten coolest moments of my life. It was such a wonderful feeling to be surprised for something so special.

Celebration ensued. We feasted like kings. The food was Russian-Georgian fare and insanely delicious.

The food was served “family-style” on the large table for 30 (or so). I was filling my plate with all sorts of goodies: cabbage rolls, eggplant salad, lamb, and dumplings. Then I saw it… my favorite, beef stroganoff. I couldn’t grab it fast enough. I needed to get that buttery-perfection in my mouth immediately.

In search of a spoon, I noticed one in the rice bowl. I casually knocked it against the side of the bowl to shake off any pieces of rice before I dug into the stroganoff.

Well… the hitting of the spoon against the bowl caused quite a loud noise. Loud enough for people to think I wanted to give a speech.

In a matter of seconds, the entire room was looking at me.

Shoot. I didn’t want to speak. I had nothing prepared. I just wanted to eat the damn stroganoff.

Someone yelled, “speech,” and I felt inclined to say something.

The only thing that came to mind was… “The beef stroganoff is really good.” And I said it in my squeaky, pre-pubescent voice.

Not exactly an inspirational or related to a loving wedding toast.

So I continued…

“What do they call a herd of masturbating cattle?”

The crowd had a very confused look on their faces. Maybe some were overcome in horror, I don’t really know; it’s all really fuzzy.

“Beef stroganoff.”

I could feel my face getting hot. I decided to just sit down.

I heard a few chuckles but I think for the most part people were confused and most likely in shock that I used the word “masturbation” in a wedding toast that made no mention of the wedding or couple.

Luckily, there was a big Moscow mule in front of me and I frantically took large gulps to calm my nerves… and ego.

Throughout the evening, people casually mentioned to me that they loved my awkward toast. Or should I say “Pawkward” toast.

Let’s this be another lesson kids… don’t try to tell bad jokes at inappropriate times. And always, always, order the beef stroganoff.